* K48 party @ Deitch Projects Brooklyn 1/16/04
*Weird brief party with Gloria and a few lesbians @ Boogaloo 1/17/04
*My home and my stuff. It's ever so interesting... Welcome!
*What's a personal webpage without pet pictures???
*Box party @ Nowhere Bar 1/19/04 (Participants included: many rowdy lezzies)
*Today I did laundry. 1/20/04
*Chan & Susanna's birthday party 1/21/04 (gratuitous celeb sighting included!) (Was too scared to get a pic of Vincent Gallo though, dammit.)
*Carrie & Keeva's birthday party @ Sway 1/22/04
*Paradise Vacations got busted early so I went over to Mad Clams @ The Hole for a second. 1/23/04
*Storm 1/27/04
*My trip to the gynecologist. 1/29/04
*A Tour of Magicland, home to Philip & Grant (and Debbie and Jonas and PartyTime the good cat and Diva the bad cat and some other people live there too but I can't keep track...) 1/29/04
*Queer Prom @ The Hole. What a psycho night. You can't really tell from the pictures but the Hole was more crowded tonight than I've ever seen it. You could not move in there. Also my co-workers were all dancing in their underpants everywhere. 1/30/04
*1/31/04 A typically atypical Saturday. Featuring sexy pictures of my girlfriend Glenda!
*Why a Toys in Babeland staff party is not like any other staff party. 2/1/04
*2/4/03: Feelin' a bit rundown. Wanna go visit Jim upstate like right now. He sent me this lovely email postcard..........
*My trip to the radiologist. 2/5/04
*Something strange is going on with me. @ Mad Clams and back home...2/6-7/04
*I'm on a binge. Dizzee Rascal @ Volume, then the Hole, then I took advantage--I mean, pictures of beautiful Coni. 2/7-8/04
*After that weekend, I'm taking a relaxing trip to Snugglesville, population: Amy and Lucky Star. 2/9/04
*Hanna's back, yay! My favorite Swedish Satan-worshipping narcoleptic homeless lesbian supermodel/art-star houseguest. 2/10/04
*Bar-Hopping with Drunky. 2/11/04
*Pia's opening @ Deitch. My left boob is immortalized. 2/12/04
*Happy Valentine's Day. Can you say "shame spiral?" 2/13-14/04
*Agathe's opening @ Emily's name-shifting gallery. 2/16/04
*Everything means less than zero, hey!  2/18/04
*The Gossip and beyond. 2/19/04
*Thrifting in Dirty Jerz w/ Glen & JD. 2/20-21/04
*Walking down Orchard Street... 2/24/04
*Oops. 2/26/04
*Early Man @ The Hole. 2/28/04

*I do not recommend watching German performance art while hungover. 2/29/04 (leap day)
*3/3-7/04: I've been neglecting you, my beloved online diary thingy, I've been experimenting with being a drunkard. Hanna's been coaching me but I'm afraid I'm not very good at it. Here are some pics from the past few hazy days. I like taking pictures of balloons and people dancing...  (P.S. I dared Mel to sit on the toilet at the Hole and she did! Holy crap Mel, I hope you got your Hep shots! Also, is it bad that I think this pic is totally hot???)
*The Whitney Buy-Any-Ole-Painting Sale opening. 3/9/04
*Nicole Eisenman's art opening. 3/12/04
*Faces of Death XXVI: Death by Karaoke! 3/13/04
*Yes, I am a model. If you cut me, do I not bleed salad? 3/16/04
*3/18/04: DJed at A-Ron's bday party at awful club BLVD. It was fun playing Bikini Kill in such a bougie place. Afterwards... I don't wanna talk about it.
*3/19/04: A fantastically magical visit to a magically fantastic, uh... fantasy magicland.
*3/20/04: What, the Hole again?
*3/21/04: Happy Birthday Patrick! (Smiths night @ Sway)
*3/26/04: I didn't go out all week cuz I was writing shit for Vice. Tonight I finally ventured out only to discover that my camera is totally fucked. Such sadness...
*3/27/04: Mystery Moustache Contest!!!
*3/28/04: A very classy dinner party indeed. La dee da.
*3/30/04: This is my lovely intern, Patrick. I taught him how to make a webpage as fun-tastic as this one, so now if you just can't get enough of the Hole or the Fish (or if you like skateboarders, Guns 'n' Roses, "eww-yr-weird"s and the word "epic"), then head on over to Patrick's Epicly Later'd Webpage!!! It's just like mine only dude-r!!! Catch the fever!!!
*3/31/04: My camera seems to have magically healed! Thank you Satan!
*4/3/04: Long Live The Weekend Warriors! Plus a tour of Merks' Place and all her weird shit!
*4/6/04: Tuesday Night... They Bite! @ Happy Ending.
*4/8/04: An Obsession and an Old Friend...
*4/9/04: Happy Birthday Jeanine! @ Some Hardcore Karaoke Joint in Chinatown (not Winnies).
*4/11/04: I'm off to the fucking Catskills till Wednesday to visit my Orthodox Jewish parents for the last days of Passover. Oy. This is not going to be fun. I am trying to be nice to my parents. I even went to Payless and bought a pair of "ladies pumps" to wear with the two respectable skirts that I have stashed in the back of my closet for such occasions. Can you imagine? Total. Nightmare. Wish me luck that they don't accidentally discover my pussy tattoo since I will be sharing a room with them. Sleeping on a cot. A COT.
*4/14/04: Actually it ended up being a pullout sofa-chair that wasn't too uncomfortable. Still...
*4/22/04: East Village Radio rulez!
*4/29/04: I'M BAAAAA-AAAAACK!!!
*5/2/04: Signe came over and we swapped each others ipod songs so now I have like thousands of songs to go through and listen to and decide if I wanna let them live or kill them. I decide their fate! I am the total god of these songs! Plus Melissa and Erik broke up (boo!) so now she's staying with me at Amy's Halfway House for Blondes (past luminary lodgers have included blondes Philip and Hanna). So you see I am a bit preoccupied, but hopefully I will be up for some antics later in the week. Ta ta!
*5/6/04: I had a totally fun night and forgot to bring my camera out. Lamesville, population: me. To sum up in worthless words: First Lesley's house with Jesse to watch the final episode of Friends (got emotional), then Amy G.'s birthday at Village Karaoke (got rockin!). My new karaoke jam is "The Boys of Summer," the Ataris rock version where they switch the "Deadhead sticker on a Cadillac" to a "Black Flag sticker on a Cadillac." I plead guilty pleasure on that one. Then I did the old criss-cross between the Fish and Melissa's party at Orchard and had a nice convo with Emily J. about the terrors of crystal meth and Murphy's Law (the hardcore band not the concept). Good solid times. But since I don't have pics of the antics, it doesn't count for shit, does it?
*3/8/04: Happy Birthday Lesley!
*Come inside and warm your cockles with Lezzles Von Dazzles and JoJo Dancer, royal inhabitants of Castle Cuddles.
*5/10/04: A not especially exciting day, but a satisfying day nonetheless.
(
P.S. Mean Girls totally rules! So does the Freaks & Geeks DVD box set! I'm in teen-angst heaven!)
*5/12/04: So many hours at the Fish...
*5/13/04: A gay day is a happy day!
*5/19/04: End of an era!
*5/19/04: Spazzing out with artists!
*5/22/04: Beware! This is not for the faint of heart!
*5/24/04: I heart Taco Night!
*5/29/04: Tea party!
*6/2/04: Tonight made me sick, literally!
*6/7/04: Everyone in New York is a model--even my cat!
*6/14/04: Michael's birthday + Taco Night = A Boot-Shaped Pinata!
6/19/04: My birthday at the Hole, from what I can remember...
6/21/04: Wow, the Devendra Banhart/ Joanna Newsom show tonight was awe-fucking-some. Devendra is an insane hippie maniac with a touch of Tiny Tim. He's much crazier live than on his albums. He was also topless and he kept pinching his nipples! I told my friend to yell out "take your shirt off!" and he did, and it was funny. Joanna N. mesmerized me. She's totally from Narnia or like, the coolest renaissance fair ever. The fucking harp, man. The harp! Also Anthony played and he is basically Nina Simone except white and tranny. I didn't bring my camera because NYC security are usually such dicks, but they didn't even search my bag so I'm regretful. I'm also exhausted from standing on my tiptoes with my neck craned for like 4 hours. Tall people should be banned from the front of venues. They should have like a special roped-off area for them in the back somewhere.
6/26/04: Good picnic and bad Burmese.
6/29/04: Stranded on Governor's Island with The Thrills and a bunch of teenagers.
7/4/04: July 4th Spectacular!
8/6/04: Why hello again! What oh what could get me out of my web-diary boredom slump? That's right, another edition of: Crazed Faces of Karaoke!
8/14/04: Misshapes, mistakes, misfits/ Raised on a diet of broken biscuits...
8/21/04: Second verse, same as the first...
8/23-8/24/04: Brian told me that if you put a flashlight under your balls, they glow. Everyone do that and send me pictures!
8/26/04: Pants, Sweet rides...
8/28/04: So I guess there's a rumor going around that I'm straight now. Hmm. My lips are sealed (around a big fat dick, ha ha ha!). Ew, sorry.
Come look at the insane job I've been doing for the past month...
Labor Day weekend at ye olde genetically-modified soybean farm.
9/8/04: Special guest photographers page!
9/10-11/04: Fabulous fashion week photos! NOT! (I wanna bring back saying "Not!" I think it's time for that to be really funny again.)
9/14/04: The Vice fashion show made me not hate fashion for a few minutes.
9/18/04: Last Saturday night ever at the Hole...and I spent it at Lit.
9/19-25/04: Weekly roundup, oh yay.
9/28-29/04: People on the streets! (dee-da dee-da day)
THESE ARE THE ARCHIVES!
(or click here to go back... to the future!)